A sleepy and chilly good morning to you all. I blog this morning for no really good reason, but I'll make up a few that should pass for acceptable reasons anyway: 1- I've got flying to visit Minnesota on the brain at the moment, as I'll be doing that in just under a month now! (I'm so excited!) 2-I'll be flying with Qantas, which should make everybody happy, since they feed and entertain me quite adequately, and they are still the ONLY international airline to have never had a major accident; never lost a single person. and 3- It's always nice to start a day with a little chuckle if you can get one.
So Dan's grandparents (great people), they get this newsletter for the National Seniors Association, and this month they sent a copy of it to us because of what was on the back. This morning I finally read it all the way through and I really laughed out loud. My husband is going into a profession with such a fantastic sense of humour :)
I can't be bothered to learn to scan, so I type this, word for word, as fast as I can, before I rush off to work. ENJOY!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After every flight, Qantas' pilots fill out a form, called a "gripe sheet," which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.
Never let it be said tht ground crews lack a sense of humour. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas' Pilots (marked with a P) and the Solutions Recorded (marked with an S) by Maintenance Engineers.
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.
P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.
P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.
P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to a more believable level.
P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're for.
P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.
P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious. (he he :)
P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.
And the best one for last!!! ....
P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.
31 May, 2006
16 May, 2006
Every K over is a killer
I have pondered writing this post for some time now. It's just one of those cultural differences that I find fascinating. At the moment there isn't really anything new or terribly interesting to share about my own life, so I will expose to you one of the more widely visible practices of Aussie government.
Apparently you could make the stereotype that Australians like to drive. They spend a lot of time on long roads -- driving far, and driving fast. And the media spends a lot of time on the alarming increase in car crashes. And the government spends a lot of money on billboards, radio and tv commercials, to educate people (or scare or embarrass them, whatever works) into following road rules. These are some of the wittiest ads I have seen. They are everywhere, and they are sponsored by the governement.
Every K over is a killer -- (K = kilometre...meaning every kilometre over the speed limit, in case you weren't sure). This is the campaign's major slogan. It's been around at least 6 years, since I first came here, and it must've had some shock value at first. But I don't think anyone really even notices it anymore.
Drink drive - you're a loser -- (referring to losing points on your license. when you lose too many, you lose the license. )
High speed. Low IQ.
Has your car got a nut loose at the wheel?
I see these billboards every day. They make me smile :) I can only imagine the offended motorists who would rise up if these kinds of slogans were blared out in the US. It seems terribly politically incorrect there. Here, it's just another example of the Aussie value of being a bit cheeky to say what you want to say. And I say, good on 'em. (Unfortunately, even as the campaigns are growing, they don't seem to be doing anything to actually lessen the death tolls on the roads. I have no idea how it actually compares to other countries...presumably, it's fairly average? )
So there's my bit of Aussie trivia for you for the day. Sorry it's not too exciting, that's all I've got for the moment. :)
Apparently you could make the stereotype that Australians like to drive. They spend a lot of time on long roads -- driving far, and driving fast. And the media spends a lot of time on the alarming increase in car crashes. And the government spends a lot of money on billboards, radio and tv commercials, to educate people (or scare or embarrass them, whatever works) into following road rules. These are some of the wittiest ads I have seen. They are everywhere, and they are sponsored by the governement.
Every K over is a killer -- (K = kilometre...meaning every kilometre over the speed limit, in case you weren't sure). This is the campaign's major slogan. It's been around at least 6 years, since I first came here, and it must've had some shock value at first. But I don't think anyone really even notices it anymore.
Drink drive - you're a loser -- (referring to losing points on your license. when you lose too many, you lose the license. )
High speed. Low IQ.
Has your car got a nut loose at the wheel?
I see these billboards every day. They make me smile :) I can only imagine the offended motorists who would rise up if these kinds of slogans were blared out in the US. It seems terribly politically incorrect there. Here, it's just another example of the Aussie value of being a bit cheeky to say what you want to say. And I say, good on 'em. (Unfortunately, even as the campaigns are growing, they don't seem to be doing anything to actually lessen the death tolls on the roads. I have no idea how it actually compares to other countries...presumably, it's fairly average? )
So there's my bit of Aussie trivia for you for the day. Sorry it's not too exciting, that's all I've got for the moment. :)
30 April, 2006
The Holidays, Part II
ANZAC Day
Tuesday, April 25 was a completely different kind of public holiday. The letters themselves stand for Australia and New Zealand Army Corps. It was originally recognised as a day of remembrance for veterans of the 1st World War. (First celebrated in ...1916??? Don't quote me, I'm not sure.) It's grown into a memorial day of sorts now, giving recognition to all veterans, especially of the 2 World Wars, but it's taken much more seriously than any remembrance day I'd experienced before moving here.
To tell you the truth, I'm very hesitant to write this particular piece. I had every intention of writing about it last year -- I even took pictures of the ceremony held at Junction Park Primary School. But I could never get up the guts to do it, and I seem to have since deleted the pictures.
So this year I'm going to try, but I have to make this disclaimer first. Anzac day is a really important part of Australian history, tradition, and solidarity. I've only been here 2 years. I have heard stories of the origins of Anzac day told, I have been to services and ceremonies -- 3 of them to be exact. My Australian friends who may be reading this have been a part of this day all their lives. It's a day that everybody takes to retell part of the Australian story. That's why I'm hesitant to write about it -- this is not my story to tell. Many who read this would tell it much better than I. So I won't try to actually detail the story for you. If you've seen the movie "Gallipoli" with Mel Gibson, I think that gives a pretty good picture of what ANZAC day commemorates, and certainly the emotions that go along with it. I've also found some websites where Aussies tell the story, and they do it quite well.
http://www.cultureandrecreation.gov.au/articles/anzac/
http://www.awm.gov.au/commemoration/anzac/index.htm
What I will tell you are my own experiences and interpretations.
As a teacher, I have to be a part of a ceremony at school on the day before Anzac Day. And as a teacher of kids who are new to the country, I have to prepare the kids for what they're going to see and hear.
I tell them there will be some singing of some very serious songs, there will be some old people there who fought in a war a long time ago. They're wearing special badges that show us that they worked very hard in the war and they were very brave. There are going to be some long speeches, and we have to be quiet and respectful while the people talk. Since the kids I'm working with really don't understand long speeches in English very well, I summarise what the speeches will probably be about. They will talk a lot about mateship, I tell the kids. Mateship is very important in Australia. It's about looking out for your friends and being brave to help them even when it's hard.
When we walk outside and sit down to watch the ceremony, kids from each class line up to lay wreaths of flowers on the memorial at the front of the school, and at the end of the ceremony one of the older students plays the traditional tune on the trumpet: The Last post. Later in the day I talk with groups of my students again. They ask about the flowers and the "special rock" -- "Is dead people under there? Is people died at school?" I use all of my best ESL teaching skills to try to explain what a memorial is.
We talk about war and how many people die in wars and it's very sad. This concept, my African refugee students understand completely. They understand it better than I do. I tell them about how a long, long time ago, there was a war far away in other countries. It wasn't Australia's war, but they had to go anyway, to help England. A lot of boys went to fight -- boys who were only 17 or 18 or 19 years old. (This the kids understand too, they've known family members that age in wars). Some of those boys had to fight at one place where they didn't have a lot of help, and most of them got killed. They were loyal to their friends and tried to help their friends, even though they died. And ever since then, Australians have had this special day to remember their mates who had to fight, and to pray that there are no more big wars.
My students' response to this day is one of the things that has put a few tears in my eyes both years. They are so amazingly quiet and good all through the ceremony. They sing the songs without knowing any of the words, but seeming to understand what it means.
Here's a poem I just thought I'd share...it's read at all the dawn church services and state school services which I did attend…and probably lots of other things that I didn't attend.
For the Fallen
by Laurence Binyon
They shall grow not old, As we that are left grow old.
Age shall not weary them, Nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun, And in the morning,
We will remember them.
Lest we Forget
And on a slightly lighter note...one ingredient in Anzac day that I can really get into...ANZAC Biscuits. or Bikkies. For those in the US, those are cookies, and they're fantastic! They're sort of a famous traditional food for ANZAC day, and of course they have a story related to World War 1 as well. The cookies are made with rolled oats and coconut and they're quite crunchy. They were made by the wives and friends and families of soldiers in WW1 and sent to the soldiers in Turkey. The bikkies didn't spoil over the long trip. There's a slightly more detailed version of the story here http://www.anzacday.org.au/miscellaneous/bikkies.html
And the recipe (for creative, cross-cultural chefs :) http://www.juncparkss.eq.edu.au/surfweb/anzac_biscuits.htm
So I can't help but think that a country who has not only marches and songs and ceremonies, but even a special cookie that they make every year just at this time to help tell this story, has some pretty strong emotional ties to this part of their history. I get the feeling that the Australians and New Zealanders who fought in both world wars were not always treated like other soldiers. It seems they were often given the hopeless campaigns, the ones that were expected to be lost, and where most of them were killed. In WW2, many whole companies of ANZACS were sent to battles, only to be left behind to become prisoners of war, where they suffered for many years of the war.
The overwhelming feelings expressed on this particular holiday are not those of pride in victory in battle or of fighting for freedom for our great country. They are feelings of pride in people who fought for their friends. They are feelings of mateship and respect and of remembering the great loss that comes of war -- that it might not happen again.
I can't guarantee that I've interpreted that all quite right, or that I've been able to keep from boring you. But maybe after 2 more years, I'll be able to sum it up a bit easier and with fewer words. Then again, maybe not.
Another Holiday
Tomorrow is Monday, and it's another public holiday! Another reason to respect and love this new country of mine. This one is Labour Day, and from what I can gather so far, it's a lot like the same holiday in the states. A day off work to honour all those who work, and the labour unions who fought for fair working conditions especially at the beginnings of our nations. One of those things, I think, that both countries have very much in common. Danny and I plan to enjoy the day off together immensely :)
Wow, this is way too long!
Lots of love to friends on both sides of the pond, and scattered wherever you are!
Tuesday, April 25 was a completely different kind of public holiday. The letters themselves stand for Australia and New Zealand Army Corps. It was originally recognised as a day of remembrance for veterans of the 1st World War. (First celebrated in ...1916??? Don't quote me, I'm not sure.) It's grown into a memorial day of sorts now, giving recognition to all veterans, especially of the 2 World Wars, but it's taken much more seriously than any remembrance day I'd experienced before moving here.
To tell you the truth, I'm very hesitant to write this particular piece. I had every intention of writing about it last year -- I even took pictures of the ceremony held at Junction Park Primary School. But I could never get up the guts to do it, and I seem to have since deleted the pictures.
So this year I'm going to try, but I have to make this disclaimer first. Anzac day is a really important part of Australian history, tradition, and solidarity. I've only been here 2 years. I have heard stories of the origins of Anzac day told, I have been to services and ceremonies -- 3 of them to be exact. My Australian friends who may be reading this have been a part of this day all their lives. It's a day that everybody takes to retell part of the Australian story. That's why I'm hesitant to write about it -- this is not my story to tell. Many who read this would tell it much better than I. So I won't try to actually detail the story for you. If you've seen the movie "Gallipoli" with Mel Gibson, I think that gives a pretty good picture of what ANZAC day commemorates, and certainly the emotions that go along with it. I've also found some websites where Aussies tell the story, and they do it quite well.
http://www.cultureandrecreation.gov.au/articles/anzac/
http://www.awm.gov.au/commemoration/anzac/index.htm
What I will tell you are my own experiences and interpretations.
As a teacher, I have to be a part of a ceremony at school on the day before Anzac Day. And as a teacher of kids who are new to the country, I have to prepare the kids for what they're going to see and hear.
I tell them there will be some singing of some very serious songs, there will be some old people there who fought in a war a long time ago. They're wearing special badges that show us that they worked very hard in the war and they were very brave. There are going to be some long speeches, and we have to be quiet and respectful while the people talk. Since the kids I'm working with really don't understand long speeches in English very well, I summarise what the speeches will probably be about. They will talk a lot about mateship, I tell the kids. Mateship is very important in Australia. It's about looking out for your friends and being brave to help them even when it's hard.
When we walk outside and sit down to watch the ceremony, kids from each class line up to lay wreaths of flowers on the memorial at the front of the school, and at the end of the ceremony one of the older students plays the traditional tune on the trumpet: The Last post. Later in the day I talk with groups of my students again. They ask about the flowers and the "special rock" -- "Is dead people under there? Is people died at school?" I use all of my best ESL teaching skills to try to explain what a memorial is.
We talk about war and how many people die in wars and it's very sad. This concept, my African refugee students understand completely. They understand it better than I do. I tell them about how a long, long time ago, there was a war far away in other countries. It wasn't Australia's war, but they had to go anyway, to help England. A lot of boys went to fight -- boys who were only 17 or 18 or 19 years old. (This the kids understand too, they've known family members that age in wars). Some of those boys had to fight at one place where they didn't have a lot of help, and most of them got killed. They were loyal to their friends and tried to help their friends, even though they died. And ever since then, Australians have had this special day to remember their mates who had to fight, and to pray that there are no more big wars.
My students' response to this day is one of the things that has put a few tears in my eyes both years. They are so amazingly quiet and good all through the ceremony. They sing the songs without knowing any of the words, but seeming to understand what it means.
Here's a poem I just thought I'd share...it's read at all the dawn church services and state school services which I did attend…and probably lots of other things that I didn't attend.
For the Fallen
by Laurence Binyon
They shall grow not old, As we that are left grow old.
Age shall not weary them, Nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun, And in the morning,
We will remember them.
Lest we Forget
And on a slightly lighter note...one ingredient in Anzac day that I can really get into...ANZAC Biscuits. or Bikkies. For those in the US, those are cookies, and they're fantastic! They're sort of a famous traditional food for ANZAC day, and of course they have a story related to World War 1 as well. The cookies are made with rolled oats and coconut and they're quite crunchy. They were made by the wives and friends and families of soldiers in WW1 and sent to the soldiers in Turkey. The bikkies didn't spoil over the long trip. There's a slightly more detailed version of the story here http://www.anzacday.org.au/miscellaneous/bikkies.html
And the recipe (for creative, cross-cultural chefs :) http://www.juncparkss.eq.edu.au/surfweb/anzac_biscuits.htm
So I can't help but think that a country who has not only marches and songs and ceremonies, but even a special cookie that they make every year just at this time to help tell this story, has some pretty strong emotional ties to this part of their history. I get the feeling that the Australians and New Zealanders who fought in both world wars were not always treated like other soldiers. It seems they were often given the hopeless campaigns, the ones that were expected to be lost, and where most of them were killed. In WW2, many whole companies of ANZACS were sent to battles, only to be left behind to become prisoners of war, where they suffered for many years of the war.
The overwhelming feelings expressed on this particular holiday are not those of pride in victory in battle or of fighting for freedom for our great country. They are feelings of pride in people who fought for their friends. They are feelings of mateship and respect and of remembering the great loss that comes of war -- that it might not happen again.
I can't guarantee that I've interpreted that all quite right, or that I've been able to keep from boring you. But maybe after 2 more years, I'll be able to sum it up a bit easier and with fewer words. Then again, maybe not.
Another Holiday
Tomorrow is Monday, and it's another public holiday! Another reason to respect and love this new country of mine. This one is Labour Day, and from what I can gather so far, it's a lot like the same holiday in the states. A day off work to honour all those who work, and the labour unions who fought for fair working conditions especially at the beginnings of our nations. One of those things, I think, that both countries have very much in common. Danny and I plan to enjoy the day off together immensely :)
Wow, this is way too long!
Lots of love to friends on both sides of the pond, and scattered wherever you are!
29 April, 2006
The Great Autumn Holidays, Part I
April is Autumn, yes, I still try to remember that. And Autumn is the season for a series of short work weeks. Ahh... cooler days (I can really wear jeans again, and sometimes even the odd sweater), and long weekends. It's a grand time of year!
The Chocolate Holiday
The holiday season Downunder starts with a goodie -- a 4-day weekend for Easter. You may remember this if you read my update email last year about this time, but I still can't quite get over it... Easter here is all about chocolate! Ok, not ALL about chocolate. It's very much about church and faith, about the resurrection and hope, about having a big noisy meal with lots of family (at least that's what it was to us and those I've always celebrated with, in both countries.)
But here, it's NOT about some of my childhood springtime memories...which made me just a bit sad & nostalgic this year (for a minute or 2). It's not about coloured Easter eggs -- Chicken eggs here are all brown. You don't colour them. Dan claims you can you can find white eggs and dye them, but I think they're rather hard to find. He did it once or twice as a kid, but I've yet to find any other Australian who shares those hard-boiled-dyed-Easter-egg-hunt childhood memories. And it's still weird to me to celebrate Easter without the aroma of Spring -- without daffodils and lilies and lots of rain and new green grass. Those things always seemed to support the idea of new life for me. Not here. You have to believe in new life without new grass or lilies.
But don't despair for the Aussie children! There's no lack of fun for them. The Easter bunny (or The Easter Bilby, if you're into saving native Australian wildlife, which many people are these days) brings Chocolate Easter Eggs. in every imaginable shape and flavour and brightly coloured wrapping. and chocolate bunnies. (and chocolate bilbies!) I made the mistake of going to the shopping centre on the Thursday before the big Easter weekend. Oh dear! Darrell Lea is a popular chocolate chain here -- it's one of those places that always smells delicious. The people in that shop overflowed down the hallway and they lined up for about 5 shops down. This is how people love their friends and family on Easter here -- they give chocolate. Lots of it! To lots of people!
MMMmmm... I like Easter!! And don't get me wrong...even though it's Autumn, it's not like there are no flowers around. just different ones. There are always flowering trees in Brisbane. :)
The Not-so-public Public Holiday
For our 2-year wedding anniversary we got a day off together! It was a much-needed day off, after the moving in and the start of Dan's full-on Saturday flying job. Our anniversary just happened to fall on Easter Monday this year, so we had all day to celebrate. It was a good good day...and we reminisced over a very good two years. :) Can't believe how quick it's gone...
Since it was the end of the school holidays at the time, the only movies at the theatres were pretty much kids movies. So we saw Ice Age 2. Fun little flick. Not as good as the first one actually, but we were just happy to be out at the movies together. Then we went out to dinner at a nice restaurant. I thought about my parents who have recently celebrated their 30th wedding anniversary quite happily together. They went out to dinner too, and tried to remember all the places they'd lived in the 3o years, and tried to put them in order. How many homes has it been for you guys... 22? I wonder what we'll be remembering in 28 years from now.
Ok, there are more public holidays, but that's going to be the next post, otherwise this would get too long.
so....
to be continued!
The Chocolate Holiday
The holiday season Downunder starts with a goodie -- a 4-day weekend for Easter. You may remember this if you read my update email last year about this time, but I still can't quite get over it... Easter here is all about chocolate! Ok, not ALL about chocolate. It's very much about church and faith, about the resurrection and hope, about having a big noisy meal with lots of family (at least that's what it was to us and those I've always celebrated with, in both countries.)
But here, it's NOT about some of my childhood springtime memories...which made me just a bit sad & nostalgic this year (for a minute or 2). It's not about coloured Easter eggs -- Chicken eggs here are all brown. You don't colour them. Dan claims you can you can find white eggs and dye them, but I think they're rather hard to find. He did it once or twice as a kid, but I've yet to find any other Australian who shares those hard-boiled-dyed-Easter-egg-hunt childhood memories. And it's still weird to me to celebrate Easter without the aroma of Spring -- without daffodils and lilies and lots of rain and new green grass. Those things always seemed to support the idea of new life for me. Not here. You have to believe in new life without new grass or lilies.
But don't despair for the Aussie children! There's no lack of fun for them. The Easter bunny (or The Easter Bilby, if you're into saving native Australian wildlife, which many people are these days) brings Chocolate Easter Eggs. in every imaginable shape and flavour and brightly coloured wrapping. and chocolate bunnies. (and chocolate bilbies!) I made the mistake of going to the shopping centre on the Thursday before the big Easter weekend. Oh dear! Darrell Lea is a popular chocolate chain here -- it's one of those places that always smells delicious. The people in that shop overflowed down the hallway and they lined up for about 5 shops down. This is how people love their friends and family on Easter here -- they give chocolate. Lots of it! To lots of people!
MMMmmm... I like Easter!! And don't get me wrong...even though it's Autumn, it's not like there are no flowers around. just different ones. There are always flowering trees in Brisbane. :)
The Not-so-public Public Holiday
For our 2-year wedding anniversary we got a day off together! It was a much-needed day off, after the moving in and the start of Dan's full-on Saturday flying job. Our anniversary just happened to fall on Easter Monday this year, so we had all day to celebrate. It was a good good day...and we reminisced over a very good two years. :) Can't believe how quick it's gone...
Since it was the end of the school holidays at the time, the only movies at the theatres were pretty much kids movies. So we saw Ice Age 2. Fun little flick. Not as good as the first one actually, but we were just happy to be out at the movies together. Then we went out to dinner at a nice restaurant. I thought about my parents who have recently celebrated their 30th wedding anniversary quite happily together. They went out to dinner too, and tried to remember all the places they'd lived in the 3o years, and tried to put them in order. How many homes has it been for you guys... 22? I wonder what we'll be remembering in 28 years from now.
Ok, there are more public holidays, but that's going to be the next post, otherwise this would get too long.
so....
to be continued!
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